Week 16
- James Wilson
- Dec 24, 2025
- 8 min read
’Twas the night before Week Seventeen, and all through the league,
Every manager was spiraling, fueled by hope, fear, and greed.
The waiver wire lay barren, no miracles in sight,
Just lineup tweaks and doomscrolling deep into the night.
Two teams stood remaining, the rest long since dead:
Kayak Pirates vs. showmedamoney! — the final thread.
On one side sat Jeff, Jacob, and Daniel Smith,
A software nerd, college kid, and teen chasing myth.
Jeff coded by day and tilted by night,
Fueled by donuts and takes that were confidently… not right.
He rostered Josh Allen, who slings it with flair,
Bijan dancing through defenses like he owns the air.
Trey McBride caught passes like rent was past due,
And JSN — yes, that JSN — thanks KRABS, who knew?
Jeff’s eye’s on a second ring, history in sight,
While praising the parents of homeschool kids… yeah, right.
Jacob at JMU said, “Trust the process, it’s fine,”
Daniel just nodded, still grounded till halftime.
Three minds, one roster, chaos refined,
Nothing says “championship” like a group chat at 1:09.
Across the field Billy stood calm(ish), composed,
A Realtor by trade, but emotionally exposed.
Crab legs on standby, champagne on ice,
Chasing ring number three — now wouldn’t that be nice?
Derrick Henry stampeded, Puka soared,
Dak threw darts, and AJ Brown roared.
But then came the question, the seasonal dread:
“Do I start Justin Jefferson… or not?” Billy said.
He flipped coins, checked rankings, asked strangers online,
Changed his lineup eight times before halftime.
The matchup projections swung left and right,
Sleepless in Week 17, staring straight at the light.
The clocks struck kickoff, the stress hit its peak,
Friendships paused for one brutal week.
Every catch brought cheers or despair,
Every red zone trip pulled out fresh gray hair.
So here’s to the Pirates, chasing ring two,
And showmedamoney!, eyeing number three too.
By Monday night, one champ will gloat,
The other will claim, “I knew I should’ve changed my flex.”
And as fantasy fades with one final scream,
Merry Christmas to all — and screw your opponent’s team.
And with that lovely classic full of Christmas Cheer we have finally arrived at the biggest event of the Fantasy Football season: Fantasy Bowl XXV.
Let's not waste anytime and let's get straight to the breakdown!
Kayak Pirates
2025 Record: 12-3
Number of Championships: 1 Last time in Fantasy Bowl: 2024
Number of Previous Fantasy Bowl Appearances: 4
Jeff has been declared a Juggernaut all season, but honestly he is pretty lucky to still be alive. His team sorted of busted in Week 16, but he still managed to scored 94 points and pull out a victory. But are we really surprised? Jeff has now been in the Fantasy Bowl three consecutive years. He is the third manager to accomplish such a feat (The Commish 01, 02, 03 & The Institute 14, 15, 16) Jeff has lost the last two though. His QB is Josh Allen. Is anyone else seeing the clear Buffalo Bills corollary here? Something feels different in 2025 though.
Let's take a look at the biggest questions for his Week 17 lineup:
Is Josh Allen healthy?
Josh Allen had his worst scoring week of the year in Week 16 with 0 touchdowns and only 130 passing yards. He apparently had an MRI on his foot at Halftime. He is on the injury report for Week 17. It feels like he is indestructible but can Jeff survive another week of single digit fantasy points from Josh Allen?
Will the real Ashton Jeanty please stand up?
I mean where the heck did that Week 16 performance come from? He had three straight weeks of single digit performances before he broke out big time with a 30 point outburst on Jeff's bench. And now he finds himself in the starting lineup. This is the ultimate gamble for a first round pick. Will Ashton prove that he was the right pick all along, or will this just cement Jeanty as a Trent Richardson level regret?!?!
Why did Jeff spend $24 on the Lions Defense?
I mean I get that people really like Cookies, but if Jeff doesn't plan on starting them, he did it just to block Billy from picking him up? And if Billy is already losing to VZ in the race for the most cookies, why didn't he unload for the Lions? It will be very interesting to see who is the highest scoring defense between the Steelers, Patriots, and Lions. Getting this wrong could mean the difference between a Championship or an offseason of regret.
showmedamoney!
2025 Record: 10-5
Number of Championships: 2
Last time in Fantasy Bowl: 2023
Number of Previous Fantasy Bowl Appearances: 5
Hey what the heck. Let's keep the Billy and Music Video joke going. It's the Fantasy Bowl and this guy has now tied VZ and Umphlett for second place in the league with 6 Fantasy Bowl appearances, this really is the most wonderful time of the year for Billy:
Let's take a look at the biggest questions for his Week 17 lineup:
Will Justin Jefferson Start?
Billy finally benched Jefferson in Week 16 and I really don't blame him. He has been awful. But he actually showed a little bit of life in Week 16 and had his highest scoring week since Week 9. Right now Jefferson is on the bench, but with DK Metcalf suspended he has moved Terry McLaurin (with Josh Johnson as the QB) into the lineup. This is a tough call because McCarthy is hurt (but it wasn't like he was really throwing the ball to Jefferson). I have no idea what I would do here, but just the sentence of benching Justin Jefferson is just hard for me to wrap my mind around.
Is Billy Making the right call by benching Week 16 starters?
Jefferson isn't the only headline on the bench. Early reports are that Jalen Hurts and Travis Kelce have been benched too. I don't blame Billy for rolling with Prescott vs. the Redskins (they are the second best fantasy defense for QBs to face). And Travis Kelce and the Chiefs seem to be done with a 3rd string QB and rumors of retirement in the media. Reports state that Billy is going to be going with Franchise Move of the Week winner Juwan Johnson. Can Billy capture lightning in a bottle again in Week 17?
What Happens if the 49ers and Seahawks win before Monday Night?
This is a little bit of forecasting, but if the 49ers and Seahawks both win on Sunday then the Rams cannot win the NFC West. With them playing on Monday night is there the chance that they change how they play or gasp even bench Stafford or Nacua vs. the Falcons? I have no idea but these are the types of nightmare scenarios that saavy Fantasy Managers prepare backup plans for.
Billy is scrappy, but I am going with the Kayak Pirates to finally break through and get his second Championship:
Kayak Pirates 127 - showmedamoney! 97
Let's get to the EVC's writeup of the Dream Job league!
Welcome to the Week 16 “Dream Job” recap. Merry Christmas to all! Krabs I hope you get your John Cena Action Figure.
We officially have our championship matchup between Everly and Derek. Good luck to both, and I personally think whoever wins this matchup should become the best fantasy manager in their respective household.
Starting off with the two seeded Everly, who honestly no one expected to come out as a resounding fantasy manager. Coming off a tight win over James in the semifinals, Everly looks to bring the Woodcox family another championship. Led by Drake “Drake Maye” Maye, Everly has had very solid QB play. Surrounded by weapons like Amon Ra St Brown and Chase Brown, she certainly has the firepower to take home the trophy.
Her opponent will be the 4 seeded Derek. Coming off a huge upset over 1 seed juggernaut Daniel, Derek looks to keep his momentum going. Jared Goff was a key part in his upset. Puka Nacua, Christian Mccaffrey and James Cook have all been valiant weapons in leading Derek to this moment. Can they have one more awesome week? Derek will also be without main man DK Metcalf, as he decided to become an MMA fighter. Will that come back to haunt Derek?
Move of the Week:
Derek needed all the points he could get in a high scoring game with Daniel, and thats exactly what Eddy Piniero did. He had a solid 12 points to edge out Derek into the championship.
Manager of the Week:
As I said, Derek pulled off a shocking upset over the number 1 seed. Not much more to be said.
Manager of the Weak:
Not really much wrong to say about our semifinal matchup so I’ll give this award to Jon scheyer and Dook for blowing the game against Texas Tech.
MVP:
I have nominated:
Puka Nacua (Derek)
Chase Brown (Everly)
As I said in last week’s column, Puka had already scored 34 points to give Derek a huge lead in the semifinal game. Derek was able to maintain that lead, with Puka being the cornerstone of it. He is starting to look like the best fantasy wr this year. Congrats to Puka!
Thanks for reading the week 16 recap as we strive to be a better league than the playoffs league.
Until next week…….
-Executive Vice Commish
Now I don't want to take away from the luster of the Fantasy Bowl, but I was challenged by a manager whose name rhymes with BLABS that I need to bring the statistical heat this week in The Notes because he was so confident in how great his results were over the history of this league. So I thought I would just do a little snapshot of league history after 25 seasons.
Yes that's right, I have the most wins and points scored in league history.
Oh wait, I can hear you saying it now, but that's because you use to dominated us all the time decades ago (which is true). You are old news Gold Standard, just look at the stats over the last ten years...
Welp. I have the most victories over the last 10 years too. But I guess I am only second in points scored after Jeff, so you got me manager that rhymes with BLABS. I guess I am old news...
Before we get to this week’s awards, check out this week’s episode of Gridiron Heights.
Season 10, Episode 15:
Manager of the Weak
While 2024 was a fever dream for black is for sunday, 2025 came to a screeching halt in Week 16. Lamar Jackson let him down. Big time. And to add insult to injury, Brent had 4 players score a combined 86 points on his bench. Brutal. The one silver lining is that at least we know that Brent is used to heartbreak. But this time he can at least look at that Trophy and remember the good times and go back to the drawing board.
Move of the Week
In this column last week I called out that the Houston Texans were going to be a big factor in the matchup. And they scored a touchdown. But still got outscored by the New Orleans Defense. The Saints. It takes guts to start a defense as bad as the Saints in a Fantasy semifinal, but it was clear that Jeff had been preparing for this matchup (he had the Saints on his roster since Week 12 as one of his three defenses). They scored 19 points and honestly were the difference in winning and losing. Massive move and the reason that he is playing in yet another Fantasy Bowl.
MVP
Puka Nacua, Bijan Robinson
Josh Allen, Bucky Irving, and Trey McBride all busted in Week 16 yet Jeff still found a way to win (even with Jeanty and Warren scoring a combined 56 points on his bench). Why did he win? Well the Saints defense, but Bijan Robinson earned every penny of what Jeff traded for him in Week 16 with 22 massive points. This was exactly why he traded for Bijan and he has to hope he can do it one more time in 2025.
Manager of the Week
Alot of talk about Jeff and Brent's matchup, but Billy has won yet again and finds himself with a chance to win yet ANOTHER championship. Look people, face the facts, this guy is a Playoffs machine. Who has the most Playoffs victories over the last 10 years? Yeah that's right. Billy does with 5 (he is tied with VZ but that's an insignificant detail that I don't need to really harp on). Can Billy be the 4th member of the Three Championship club?!?!?
Until Week 17...
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
-The Commish
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